Taking up space in the back of the BadAssMobile is the Bad Mother Fucker, nature's way of saying "Don't touch."

Born in Germany, over time most of Bad Mother's vital juices have been replaced by Jack Daniels. The man has no home that isn't merely a nest of empty whiskey bottles - and even then, he mostly sleeps in the back of the car or in bordellos. His only blanket - a living quilt of hookers.

Bad Mother's wanted in more than 90 countries, and even has warrants out in aboriginal cultures that haven't yet developed written systems of law. It is rumored that when man finally meets intelligent life from space, the first thing the aliens will want is Bad Mother's head on a platter.

Wears: Silk Shirt, thousand dollar suit. Boxers.
Drinks: Jack Daniels, neat.
Zodiac: Moon Child, sign of the Pressed Ham
Defining Moment: Closing down two bars in a single night and forcing an entire restaurant to eat his vomit in the yet unpublished Vomit Soup.
Theme Music: I'm The One